Self questioning

Why am I doing this? Is a question I find myself asking increasingly often.

This must be part of the duality of the life I’m living. On one side I’m aware of things I should do, details I should improve, and on the other I have very little control over what’s going on in my brain.

I’m working on something and all of a sudden I’m reading a thread on twitter where people are yelling each other about a subject I really don’t care about that much.

Why am I doing this? Why am I reading this thread? what good can come out of all this?

Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy about this. The fact that I’m constantly asking myself these questions is a sign of progress. It’s a sign that a part of me is noticing these moments and is trying to correct and improve the situation.

And that’s good.